Going Off The Rails On A Crazy Trade, Part 2.

As per the title and preceding post, we're back to give you another seemingly ridiculous trade proposal that actually makes a little sense. This time, I suggest that the Marlins trade right fielder Giancarlo Stanton to the Mariners for starting pitchers Taijuan Walker and Danny Hultzen, corner infielder D.J. Peterson, cash considerations, and a player to be named later.

Before you start brandishing those pitchforks, Marlins fans, I'd like to ask all 8 of you (zing!) to calm down and hear me out. Stanton is a monster. You know it, and the rest of us know it too. We all know it so well, in fact, that I don't think it's necessary to spend too much time explaining why the Mariners would want him. Every team in baseball wants him. He's a home run machine (154 in his short career), with outrageous power during an era where power is severely lacking across the game. He's still very young, and will play all of next season at the relatively tender age of 25. He's led the NL in slugging twice, the first of which (2012) he led all of MLB.

Here's where this idea becomes insulting: I'm suggesting that he spend even a small portion of his career watching line drives die in the cavernous confines of Safeco Field. This is definitely one of the more ludicrous landing spots for the young slugger. Plus, it's difficult to assess his true value, considering he's not in the commonly accepted "prime" years (while every baseball player is unique like a snowflake, these flecks tend to peak between the ages of 27 and 32 before melting) yet he's already accomplished so much with the bat. He even grades out as a pretty good fielder, with positive UZR and DRS marks every season except 2013. Hell, the only deal wherein Miami could really get commensurate value is if they shipped him to Anaheim, and even then they'd probably have to take Josh Hamilton off the Angels' hands to get Mike Trout.

So let's just look at why a trade with Seattle might be easier to abide. There's no denying that Safeco seriously suppresses home runs, but to what extent? It's 12th in baseball in home runs allowed, with 1.053 home runs allowed per game over the course of a full season (anything over 1.000 is considered to favor the batter over the pitcher), which is higher than I thought it would rank. Admittedly, it rates even lower when you isolate right-handed hitters, with a HR% (home runs per at-bat) of 2.37 percent, only ahead of Busch Stadium (Cardinals), Kauffman Stadium (Royals), PNC Park (Pirates), and...Marlins Park? Wait, seriously? Stanton's been wreaking this kind of havoc in a park that's actually LESS conducive to his power than Safeco? This might be less insane than I originally thought.

No, no, it's still squirrel-feces nutty. But there's reason to believe that Stanton could do a similar amount of damage, if not more, in Seattle than Miami. Of course, he'd have little lineup protection outside of Robinson Cano and the resilient Kyle Seager (with the slim possibility of Hanley Ramirez, if the recent rumors are to be considered valid), but what protection does he have now? Christian Yelich? Adeiny Hechavarria? Casey McGehee's one-year blip? Give me a break. He would add serious right-handed power to a starting nine that currently hosts a single righty, Mike Zunino, who despite being a catcher with a sub-.200 BA still managed to swat 22 long balls in 2014. After musing that I didn't need to explain why anyone would want Stanton, I'll finish by ending my fourth paragraph on the subject.

Now we look at what the Marlins would receive in return for The Player Formerly Known As Mike. Taijuan Walker has long been the crown jewel of Seattle's farm system, and those fruits finally came to bear last season with a 2.61 ERA (3.68 FIP) and 34 strikeouts over 38 innings (5 starts, 8 games). Keep in mind that he only turned 21 after those first 3 appearances, and will spend most of next season at that age. Combine that with his solid minor league numbers, his 4-pitch arsenal highlighted by a nasty slider, and his increasing control over said pitches, and Walker could easily contend for Cy Young votes in the near future. He's already part of an impressive rotation, behind King Felix Hernandez, Hisashi "Flying Salmon" Iwakuma (still the undefeated champion of Best Baseball Nicknames) and fellow top prospect James Paxton. But if he was on the Marlins, he'd be throwing with Nathan Eovaldi (formerly of the Dodgers, still of the 95.7 MPH fastball), Henderson Alvarez (who seemingly throws complete games at will), and of course, Jose Fernandez once he's fully recovered from Tommy John surgery. Throw Hultzen into the mix to compete with Jarred Cosart, Tom Koehler, and Andrew Heaney for the last two spots, and the Marlins suddenly have a very strong, enviable amount of depth at starting pitcher. They could even deal one or two of the aforementioned also-rans for some significant infield help. Of course, they'd get some in Peterson, a top prospect with experience at both first and third (for when McGehee or Garrett Jones go through their annual slumps), which would help assuage some of the offensive woes sure to follow with Stanton's departure. Or turn Hultzen into a closer, and deal incumbent Steve Cishek for more firepower in the lineup. Really, having that much young starting pitching to deal from (or to cover for any regulars that get injured) is a godsend.

Again, this trade will never happen. Stanton will command much more in a deal than three young but mostly unproven players and the promise of future compensation (plus, a trade is further complicated by the massive 13 year, $325 million extension that is rumored to be nearing an agreement), Walker is likely staying put, and Hultzen/Peterson/money/PTBNL just isn't enough to convince Marlins owner/professional asshole Jeffrey Loria to part with the one player he doesn't want to sell. But hey, isn't that the whole point of these posts? It is. And we'll have another stupid trade idea soon.